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Author
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Topic: The Story of Struggles, the Ugliest Cat to Ever Live
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atarikat
Super Box Member!
Member # 600
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I don't even know where to begin. I'll start by prefacing the following story with the following statement: I love cats. Really, I do.
But sometimes, love just isn't enough.
When I was living in Richmond, Virginia several years ago, I met a group of kids that lived in a severely horrible ghetto house in Oregon Hill. This house was so ghetto, it came complete with bullet holes and an unflushable toilet (which was great for parties). Sometimes you would have to go and take a dump under their back porch because their house was so ghetto, you didn't want to perfume it with your stinky poo.
Anyway, there was a young couple living in this crackhouse who owned several cats, one of which I met on halloween. I don't know its real name. I only know that I thought this cat was really sweet and affectionate. Little did I know, it was in heat. I was petting this cat, thinking it was so happy and cute, but I was delusional.
You probably have seen a similar cat. The cat you know and hate is the cat with one disgusting, crusty and pussy eye. This cat is so gross, you're afraid to touch it for fear of contracting herpes or fleas, whichever you consider worse. This cat is very similar to Heggy's old icon of his bugged-out eye. Just creepy, psychotic, and weird. All at once.
Anyway, several days after meeting this cat, I returned to the house, only to realize that this cat was SO FUCKING UGLY I was ashamed to have even pet it.
Jason, my current boyfriend who was living in the crackden, had renamed the cat "Struggles." Because seriously, this cat was STRUGGLING. Struggling to live, struggling to be loved, struggling to just stay alive in the crackhouse. Struggles liked to hump everything in existence. Struggles enjoyed dragging her bloody ass all over the couch, howling for a large kitty penis to infest her nasty cat-vagina. Struggles just wanted someone to pay attention to her late-night howls of needful pleasure.
The young couple who owned Struggles had a deadbolt on their door. They decided to skip town for a week and lock all of their cats in the room. We didn't actually notice that they had left town until several days had passed. Then we started to hear sounds of violence and death. We heard, I kid you not, the evolution of Satan behind that deadbolted door. Howling. Fighting. Struggling.
I didn't know what to do. But I did know that behind that door was the most horrible existence of mammal that you could ever know or meet. I felt bad though. We tried pushing the door open just far enough to let the cats out, but unfortunately, doors in houses in the ghetto of Richmond are apparently made to be un-openable. We ended up shoving cat food under the door and pouring water in so Struggles and the other cats could eat and drink and be merry.
But seriously. How could you think a cat that looks like this can be merry???
I kid you not, that is Struggles. It's not the original Struggles, but it's the one you've probably seen somewhere, dying on the streets. I am not a supporter of euthanasia, but for this cat, I make a special exclusion.
I never took a picture of Struggles, because she was so fucking ugly she would have broken my camera. I just wanted to share this story with you because somewhere in your heart there is a special cat that just is SO UGLY you can't find a way to love it.
If you haven't gotten the image of Struggles yet, please click on the following link. I WARN YOU NOW: the following link is SO GROSS you'll pass out. Don't click if you're at work or there's someone behind you looking over your shoulder.
Another unsafe conceptual image of Struggles
I can't tell you or express to you how disgusting this cat was. But maybe you'll reply to this post with your own story of Struggles. If you ever find a cat like Struggles, please kill it.
I leave you with an image of Blackout, imitating Struggles. Perhaps this image will make you feel pleasant and happy inside:
Post your own recollection of a disgusting animal now. I'm entertained by things that cannot be loved. ![[Smile]](smile.gif)
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did you pump it in and out with your hands
:::journalisms:::
Posts: 186 | From: Fort Lauderdale, FL | Registered: Sep 2003
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Blackout
Actor Singer Writer Director Visionary Philosopher Magickian Skydiver Digital Hippie and all around Creative Artist
Member # 7
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Oh my..
Bravo!
Very entertaining and funny story. May we all help the Struggles of the world.
I was a Struggles for a while myself. That's how I'm able to do such a good impression!
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You are not your job, your titles, your possessions, your degrees, your lovers, your relationships, your place of residence, your social security number, your ID, your bills, your worries, your bank account, your age or your body. You are the timeless being that created & perceives itself through those things, and you have the power to play or not play that game. When someone asks me "what do you do?" looking for some title to pin me down, I laugh and say "EVERYTHING!" - Blackout
Posts: 7616 | From: New York City | Registered: Jul 2000
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Spritely
Zzzzzipp...spin, POP, wiggle, shhhhhvroom WEEEEE!
Member # 524
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AHhhhhhhhhhGGGGGGGGG! Why Atarikat!? Why!!!! Why? OH why? why did I click that link? Ahhhhhh!!! I am Blind. Blind! I tell you. Blinded by the heeeeedeouse thing that that was. Ahhhhhhhhh! Grrrr... That warning was not enough, it should say KEEP OUT! FOR GODS SAKE KEEP OUT!!! . I was not prepared for that. God Damn, God Damn! Seriously, I am freaking out! What the Hell was that. Dead old lady vagina, I think... I'm not sure because my corneas imploded. Why??? DON'T DO THAT!!! Ewwww! I still haven't seen "The Cyst" but it can't be worse than that.
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Play with me!*!*!*!
Posts: 310 | From: Florida | Registered: Aug 2003
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atarikat
Super Box Member!
Member # 600
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oh damn, the time in which I can edit the post has elapsed!!!!! i was going to put an extra, extra warning on it. sorry spritely. just use your glitter as a protective anti-old lady defense system. HAPPY BARFDAY TO YOU!!!!
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did you pump it in and out with your hands
:::journalisms:::
Posts: 186 | From: Fort Lauderdale, FL | Registered: Sep 2003
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Spritely
Zzzzzipp...spin, POP, wiggle, shhhhhvroom WEEEEE!
Member # 524
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Thank You. Can I now return my gift of sightlessness? Please!!! I'm on a Glitter ban ![[Insomnia]](graemlins/insomnia.gif) Do to a most misfortunate accident. That I still believe was a conspiracy to... I don't know what, but something I'm sure. So I have no comfort, No solace. They are trying to get my goomies. Over my dead old lady vagina. Never!!!
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Play with me!*!*!*!
Posts: 310 | From: Florida | Registered: Aug 2003
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atarikat
Super Box Member!
Member # 600
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Here - I post a pretty picture of a butterfly to alleviate your pain further.
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did you pump it in and out with your hands
:::journalisms:::
Posts: 186 | From: Fort Lauderdale, FL | Registered: Sep 2003
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Blackout
Actor Singer Writer Director Visionary Philosopher Magickian Skydiver Digital Hippie and all around Creative Artist
Member # 7
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I really love the picture of the first cat you posted. He's all naked and sitting with an evil look like, cum SUCK on me, stupid human! MErrrreoooowww!
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You are not your job, your titles, your possessions, your degrees, your lovers, your relationships, your place of residence, your social security number, your ID, your bills, your worries, your bank account, your age or your body. You are the timeless being that created & perceives itself through those things, and you have the power to play or not play that game. When someone asks me "what do you do?" looking for some title to pin me down, I laugh and say "EVERYTHING!" - Blackout
Posts: 7616 | From: New York City | Registered: Jul 2000
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atarikat
Super Box Member!
Member # 600
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you know, it's truly dissapointing that the internet is not profoundly populated with pictures of ugly cats! I mean i really had to do some digging to find these pictures!!!
I think i'll have to do an ugly cat hunt one weekend.
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did you pump it in and out with your hands
:::journalisms:::
Posts: 186 | From: Fort Lauderdale, FL | Registered: Sep 2003
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Shostie
Blackout's Box Illuminati and Dreaderator: Vinlar the Dreadful Only available to those with over 3000 posts
Member # 112
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Ugly cat hump?
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Maestra is indeed a sexy geek.
"Primitive humans make tools; computer-designed, high-tech hand tools." -program description from The History Channel's Modern Marvels
"I wish God were alive to see this." -Homer Simpson
"And my stage directions make no sense. How is it possible for me to wear clown make up AND be sober all at once?" -Davan MacIntire
Posts: 3653 | From: Houston, TX | Registered: Jul 2002
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Maestra
One sexy geek!
Member # 370
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Ewwww . . .
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You never know what's going to happen when you give a robot a machine gun.
Posts: 1786 | From: Houston, Texas | Registered: Feb 2003
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The Cheat
Super Box Member!
Member # 404
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One of my customers did that to their cat. The cat in the above link looks miserable. So did this cat... they know they look stupid.
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Who is the guy whos a whiney bitch? ME!
Posts: 145 | From: Strongbadia | Registered: Apr 2003
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